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The Young Augustus, DDS

Dr. Augustus is a board-certified crustacean orthodontist with more than 30 years of experience. He received his Bachelor’s degree in marine biology from Wisconsin Lutheran College in 1970 and received his orthodontic degree from Marquette University in 1981. 

Dr. Augustus founded the Tri-county Shrimp Orthodontic Study Club, a group of 21 local orthodontists committed to staying current on the latest orthodontic techniques and marine research.

He lives alone in Portland, having taken a vow of celebacy to be the next young pope. If his pope-hood does not materialize, he will fulfill his dreams of being a self-proclaimed despot. 

He has a cat name "Mommy".

 

 

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The Dentistry Award 2018

Shrimp Teeth is truly grateful to receive the Dentistry Award Gold Prize for Marine Creatures for the 7th year in a row! 

Here are a few things to look for that may mean your cRustacean needs to see an orthodontist:

  • Early or late loss of baby teeth
  • A hard time chewing or biting food
  • Disruptive mouth breathing that makes foamy bubbles in your tank
  • Claw or weird little arms sucking. Or sucking on those really long whisker things 
  • Jaws that pop or make a terrifying sound when opening and closing 
  • Bitchy mood and overall crappy personality
    (Please note this is common for lobsters and may not be indicative of any abnormal orthodontic issues)
  • Gigantic jaws and teeth that are not proportionate to the rest of the face
    (Ask yourself: does my crustacean look more like a shark than a shrimp?)
  • Crowded front teeth around age seven or eight
    (Or seventy or eighty if they are a Japanese Monster Crab)

 

Book An Appointment

Shrimp Teeth is the leading crustacean orthodontics practice. Please fill out the form and our team will contact you shortly about scheduling.* We are currently only accepting new patients by referral*

 
Name of Crustacean *
Name of Crustacean
Note: At this time we are not able to provide dentistry services for woodlice or krill
Date of Desired Appointment
Date of Desired Appointment
Please leave brief message, include patient number or "new patient"
 

Real Testimonials from Real Patients

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Morton, 94

I am so pleased with the results of my Invisalign®. Dr. Augustus told me at the beginning he wanted to give me a beautiful smile... and that's what I got! The staff were friendly and always sent appointment reminders. One time my car broke down on my way to the office, the receptionist was so kind and told me not to worry about anything and to just come in and she would squeeze me in. I highly recommend Shrimp Teeth for any crab looking to have their teeth straightened. Thank you Dr. Augustus! 

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Cindy, 4 months

I LOVE Shrimp Teeth! They're so AWESOME!! They did my teeth perfectly and it's great! The people here are soooooo nice! The receptionist even gave me a prawn-pop and said I was really brave when they put on the braces. Everyone is so sweet and they try to do your teeth as carefully as possible. You should totally come here! 

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Larry, 20

I owe my life to Dr. Aug. Before I came to Shrimp Teeth and got my braces I was a painfully shy, aging bachelor. I never came out from my lobster cave. My ma was always like "Larry, when are you gonna get your life together? You need to go out there and meet other sea animals" and I was all "Nah ma, they gonna laugh at my crooked smile!" But then Dr. Aug gave me damon™ braces and everything changed! I started to go out more, and I met the love of my life: Scuba Steve. He even said to me "You look cute with those braces Lar-Bear" ☺️ Scuba Steve sure knows how to treat a lobster.  Dr. Aug promises he'll have them off before our wedding. 💍 I owe it all to him! Thank's Dr. Aug! 

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Karl, 2

You don't know how hard it is to find health care professionals for mantis shrimp. It's all "sorry you're too aggressive", and "the last mantis shrimp punched a hole in my wall" and "will you bite me?" and on and on. But Shrimp Teeth gladly took me in and they were really professional even when I flew into a rage, punched Dr. Augustus, bit the technician, scuttled across the floor, and tried to blast my way out of the building. After finally restraining me with two dozen rubber bands, the team was able to put in my braces. My teeth look great. Thanks Shrimp Teeth! 

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